Tuesday, January 6, 2009

If Sound Effects Could Kill

I was browsing through the comments left on my previous entry and had a memory triggered by Ave's response. I decided to write a small passage regarding the memory. Embarrasing moments often make great stories.

I work as a commissioned salesman selling lawn and garden equipment, a job I've been at for nearly three years. This involves selling tractors, mowers, pressure washers, grills, etc. At the time, I was trying to devote a bit more time to my music. I had become frustrated due to the fact that I would think up guitar riffs and melodies at work, then forget them by the time I arrived home. After reading many accounts of musicians carrying small tape recorders around with them to jot down their ideas on, i figured this would be a brilliant idea!

So I purchased a small digital recorder and the next day took it to work. On my way I thought up a short riff and knew that I would want to play it when I returned home. I pulled out the recorder and made a vocal recording of the riff, using the stereotypical, heavy guitar 'choogch' sound. I then put the recorded back in my pocket, quite pleased that I would have a chance to explore this riff later that evening. Throughout the day, several more ideas came to me and I stole away to record them in private.

However, there is one problem with a device like this. The buttons are easy to hit while it is in your pocket, as there is no lock for them. As it happened, I was squatted down to show a customer the finer points of a particular pressure washer they were interested in when all of the sudden the unmistakable sound of 'choogch chuk chuk cheeewr' could be heard coming from my pocket at a volume which permited the entire department to hear. My five other co-workers, along with all the customers they were helping, stopped and looked directly at me.

I frantically reached into my pocket, hitting every button my thumb would run across as I withdrew the recorder, but to no avail. I finally, in a desperate attempt to end the embarassment, yanked the back open and violently pulled the batteries and threw them across the floor. My customer looked at me in a blend of shock and amusement and said 'I think you had a real winner there.'


It's amazing how red my face can get.

5 comments:

Ave said...

Ha! That is a total Dad thing to do, (throwing the batteries.) I will never forget laughing hysterically at his slamming of cupboards.

celtishbee said...

hahahahahahhaahhahahahhahahahaha!
...mum

L.C. Varnum said...

The greatest thing i remember was dad getting mad at me once for skipping school and, god bless him, he tried to keep from swearing so he said '...you need to grow up and quit...*his face turning red with anger*..FIDDLEY-FARTING AROUND!'

I tried to act chastized for a bit...then started laughing. Then mom started laughing. Then he started laughing.

andalucy said...

That is the most hilarious story!

(And who hasn't done their share of fiddley-farting?)

Anonymous said...

Ya, you do get a really red face....hee hee.

You know you can post recordings on a blog.